After slacking for so long...returning back to life as a medical student has been really hard. Plus, life in sem5 isnt getting any easier.
Classes...spread out through the whole day. From morning till evening, with hospital visits and clinical teaching sessions in between...energy seems to be drained constantly from my body. Feel tired all the time...and even with extra sleep...I just cant get up in the mornings.
How nice if I'm like the energizer bunny that doesnt need rest and I can like study and also be mentally prepared for all my lessons.
I'm still finding my way through tackling this system and also fitting in revision time for my finals in July too!! Finals!! The scariest exam of all!! Only 3 months left...
At the same time...Can't wait for the ball next Sat...Hopefully it'll be really fun!!
Really hope to just stuff my head with studying only and nothing else...Hopefully i'll succeed in doing that!! =p
Friday, March 24, 2006
Thursday, March 02, 2006
A LeSSoN LeaRnT ThE HaRD WaY...
Everyone hates feeling helpless in any situation unless you're craving for attention. Well, today I encountered something that did make me feel helpless.
Driving to kickboxing class at Hartamas, my car started overheating...I started to panic but tried to the max to remain calm. Luckily saw a parking space and I parked there. I got out of my car to check. I was clueless about cars so I called my mum. She told me to let the car cool and then check the water level in the radiator.
Well...after waiting a while, I tried to open it...but I was scared to open it. So i decided to just walk to the kickboxing centre and hav my class first.
After class, I checked it again..and I still didnt have the guts to open the cap which says, "Do Not Open! Caution! Hot!" So I saw another cap...it was connected to the radiator cap anyway... so I filled it up. I was totally scared but I had no choice...my brother was of no help...coz he was blurer than I was and all I could think of was HOME!!
Tried to drive home...and my car smelt like burning...and it died...in the middle of the road.
I was terrified and the drivers behind me weren't of any help...they hon me like crazy with angry faces. I finally managed to start it again...and made my way to the main road outside my housing area where this time, it just wouldn't move anymore.
Called my parents and they finally came. Turns out...I was stupid enough to fill up the wrong cap..the danger cap was the right one. The one I was afraid to open.
I always hate feeling helpless...I always want to be confident in what I do. But ever since I got into med school and today's incident...my pride has been tested many, many times.
I think that it also applies to our relationship with God. We being human tend to want to be independent. We want to feel confident, powerful, admired and so we would do anything to make sure we feel that way. But being human, we also fall into the world of helplessness. It is then we realise that in the end, despite how much we try to protect ourselves...God is the only One who can protect us from anything. We realise that we need God. We start to turn to Him for help just like my situation today. I thought I could handle things without my parents. But I couldn't. I needed them in the end coz they know whats best. Its the same with God. He will always be there for us, even when we think we don't need Him. He will still be faithful to us, waiting for us to turn our eyes upon Him.
Driving to kickboxing class at Hartamas, my car started overheating...I started to panic but tried to the max to remain calm. Luckily saw a parking space and I parked there. I got out of my car to check. I was clueless about cars so I called my mum. She told me to let the car cool and then check the water level in the radiator.
Well...after waiting a while, I tried to open it...but I was scared to open it. So i decided to just walk to the kickboxing centre and hav my class first.
After class, I checked it again..and I still didnt have the guts to open the cap which says, "Do Not Open! Caution! Hot!" So I saw another cap...it was connected to the radiator cap anyway... so I filled it up. I was totally scared but I had no choice...my brother was of no help...coz he was blurer than I was and all I could think of was HOME!!
Tried to drive home...and my car smelt like burning...and it died...in the middle of the road.
I was terrified and the drivers behind me weren't of any help...they hon me like crazy with angry faces. I finally managed to start it again...and made my way to the main road outside my housing area where this time, it just wouldn't move anymore.
Called my parents and they finally came. Turns out...I was stupid enough to fill up the wrong cap..the danger cap was the right one. The one I was afraid to open.
I always hate feeling helpless...I always want to be confident in what I do. But ever since I got into med school and today's incident...my pride has been tested many, many times.
I think that it also applies to our relationship with God. We being human tend to want to be independent. We want to feel confident, powerful, admired and so we would do anything to make sure we feel that way. But being human, we also fall into the world of helplessness. It is then we realise that in the end, despite how much we try to protect ourselves...God is the only One who can protect us from anything. We realise that we need God. We start to turn to Him for help just like my situation today. I thought I could handle things without my parents. But I couldn't. I needed them in the end coz they know whats best. Its the same with God. He will always be there for us, even when we think we don't need Him. He will still be faithful to us, waiting for us to turn our eyes upon Him.
Thursday, February 23, 2006
SKiN...
How do you comfort and assure the person you love that everything will be as good as new again when that can never happen?? How would you then convince him to take care of himself better when it only seemed to get worse each time?? Although it isnt something life threatening, but its making him feel helpless, uncomfortable and a burden to others.
That person's my grandpa. To many people they see it as him having, skin problems. Easy diagnosis? Not a big deal? Definitely NOT!! Yes, he does have skin problems but how do you take care of skin that's so fragile that even with the slightest knock on anything would cause a deep cut that bleeds for days?? How do you make a skin that's so thin and dry moist and healthier again, so that it doesn't cause itchiness or redness all over his body??
I know and understand that its all part of the aging process. But as you're older, you would prefer a more routined lifestyle and its never easy for an old man to adapt easily to any changes like us. So, each time when I or my parents check his skin, and we find areas of redness and scratch scars... it kinda upsets my grandpa and he'll try with all his might to hide those feelings.
I think that the thing that's troubling him the most is that he feels helpless and a burden to us the family members for having to take care of him in such a delicate way and yet, the skin problem isn't getting better. What made things worse was the petroleum jelly we used to help with his skin cant be used now coz, his skin over-sensitive to it now and we need special type of creams.
Many people think that its soo easy to handle something like that. All they could help with was giving comments like, "Why don't you try this cream?" I know they mean well and all but it makes me frustrated, bcoz how can it be so simple? If it was that easy, my grandpa's skin would have recovered long ago.
When I see my grandpa look so down and discouraged...I really feel like helping him take that load which I myself don't understand 100%. I just hope and pray that God will be his comfort and he'll soon be able to live with it, and learn to take care of himself better so he won't feel so helpless or a burden anymore.
That person's my grandpa. To many people they see it as him having, skin problems. Easy diagnosis? Not a big deal? Definitely NOT!! Yes, he does have skin problems but how do you take care of skin that's so fragile that even with the slightest knock on anything would cause a deep cut that bleeds for days?? How do you make a skin that's so thin and dry moist and healthier again, so that it doesn't cause itchiness or redness all over his body??
I know and understand that its all part of the aging process. But as you're older, you would prefer a more routined lifestyle and its never easy for an old man to adapt easily to any changes like us. So, each time when I or my parents check his skin, and we find areas of redness and scratch scars... it kinda upsets my grandpa and he'll try with all his might to hide those feelings.
I think that the thing that's troubling him the most is that he feels helpless and a burden to us the family members for having to take care of him in such a delicate way and yet, the skin problem isn't getting better. What made things worse was the petroleum jelly we used to help with his skin cant be used now coz, his skin over-sensitive to it now and we need special type of creams.
Many people think that its soo easy to handle something like that. All they could help with was giving comments like, "Why don't you try this cream?" I know they mean well and all but it makes me frustrated, bcoz how can it be so simple? If it was that easy, my grandpa's skin would have recovered long ago.
When I see my grandpa look so down and discouraged...I really feel like helping him take that load which I myself don't understand 100%. I just hope and pray that God will be his comfort and he'll soon be able to live with it, and learn to take care of himself better so he won't feel so helpless or a burden anymore.
Sunday, February 19, 2006
OaSiS 2
After doing a bit of quieting down and reflection...I found that I've learnt some things 2nite...Things that I think woke me up again from the dryness I've been feeling lately...
1. God has blessed MYF tremendously, a great bunch of youths who would always work together no matter how hard the workload maybe, with no hesitations.
2. A great night of praise, where youths enjoy fellowshipping with God and each other
3. 2 youth groups starting to bridge with one another
4. Being frustrated for being let down shouldn't be a barrier for me to keep my passion to serve alive
5. God restored my passion to serve again
6. God works wonders when His children put their heart and soul into doing His work
7. Always focus on the positive and not the negative
Somehow I felt refreshed tonight...after feeling sorta dry for some time...
And when I reflected on all that had happened on this long day...I find that God never ceases to amaze me...I hope He would continue to open my eyes and heart to even more exciting and amazing stuff!!
All Praise & Glory to God the Most High!!
1. God has blessed MYF tremendously, a great bunch of youths who would always work together no matter how hard the workload maybe, with no hesitations.
2. A great night of praise, where youths enjoy fellowshipping with God and each other
3. 2 youth groups starting to bridge with one another
4. Being frustrated for being let down shouldn't be a barrier for me to keep my passion to serve alive
5. God restored my passion to serve again
6. God works wonders when His children put their heart and soul into doing His work
7. Always focus on the positive and not the negative
Somehow I felt refreshed tonight...after feeling sorta dry for some time...
And when I reflected on all that had happened on this long day...I find that God never ceases to amaze me...I hope He would continue to open my eyes and heart to even more exciting and amazing stuff!!
All Praise & Glory to God the Most High!!
Friday, February 17, 2006
CoNFuSeD: Am I doing the right thing??
I know its the 2nd blog in the same early hours of the morning...but this is kinda bothering me
I just smsed a friend to not call or sms me anymore...
I've known this person since secondary school and being new and naive I was so happy that someone would actually try to be friends with me... But then, as time went by I realised that she wanted things from me which I could never, ever, possibly in my entire life give her.
However, I was soo insecure with myself at that time..I couldn't bear loosing a friend as I was new and didn't have that many friends in school. Plus, I liked the attention I was getting. Someone for once looking up to me.
I quickly realised that it was wrong to even think that way. That isn't me at all...That isn't what I've been brought up to be!
So, I made the decision to be a good friend. A friend that she could rely on. And well, she did really make full use of it. Calling me every night. Pouring out her problems which I think she exaggerates a lot just to get my attention. My guts tell me that she's taking advantage of my naiveness but well..I ignore it and thought I could change her.
I was sooo wrong...and soon I was relieved when she finished secondary school and I wont have to see her in school anymore. But she still does call me and try coming back to school to look for me. I remember making tons of excuses to get away.
Finally, its my turn to finish sec school and I moved on to continue with college and then uni.
Being busy and all she couldn't call me so much and therefore calling me was like twice a year thing. But everytime she calls...and when I show her some concern, she makes full use of it..and I get phone calls everyday for the week telling me about being sad, depressed, misunderstood, anything you can think of.
One night, I finally had the guts to tell her off that I can never talk to her or give her whatever she wants. And asked her not to call me.
And this year..being stupid, I smsed her a CNY wish...and Woosh!! She thought that we could be close again like before. And having a handphone was such a pain! Calling me and smsing me everyday... telling me that she's down...she's sad...I can't believe her anymore. I just couldn't stand it!! I can't deal with her!! I can't even get myself to confront her and talk to her on the phone when she called me!! I thought she grew up too like me and she would be different!! She never did!!
So when she smsed me again...just like every night now...I replied her sms telling her not to call me anymore that I'm uncomfortable talking to her and even requested for my number to be deleted.
I know that she's in need of a person to give her the attention she never had and all but she scares me a lot...I feel so bad right now....feel so guilty...I'm feeling guilty of having a sense of relief from having to deal with her everyday. I can't help but feel relieved. Am I a cruel person? Am I a bad person and friend? Coz I really don't want to be that kind of person...I really didn't want to hurt her!!
I just smsed a friend to not call or sms me anymore...
I've known this person since secondary school and being new and naive I was so happy that someone would actually try to be friends with me... But then, as time went by I realised that she wanted things from me which I could never, ever, possibly in my entire life give her.
However, I was soo insecure with myself at that time..I couldn't bear loosing a friend as I was new and didn't have that many friends in school. Plus, I liked the attention I was getting. Someone for once looking up to me.
I quickly realised that it was wrong to even think that way. That isn't me at all...That isn't what I've been brought up to be!
So, I made the decision to be a good friend. A friend that she could rely on. And well, she did really make full use of it. Calling me every night. Pouring out her problems which I think she exaggerates a lot just to get my attention. My guts tell me that she's taking advantage of my naiveness but well..I ignore it and thought I could change her.
I was sooo wrong...and soon I was relieved when she finished secondary school and I wont have to see her in school anymore. But she still does call me and try coming back to school to look for me. I remember making tons of excuses to get away.
Finally, its my turn to finish sec school and I moved on to continue with college and then uni.
Being busy and all she couldn't call me so much and therefore calling me was like twice a year thing. But everytime she calls...and when I show her some concern, she makes full use of it..and I get phone calls everyday for the week telling me about being sad, depressed, misunderstood, anything you can think of.
One night, I finally had the guts to tell her off that I can never talk to her or give her whatever she wants. And asked her not to call me.
And this year..being stupid, I smsed her a CNY wish...and Woosh!! She thought that we could be close again like before. And having a handphone was such a pain! Calling me and smsing me everyday... telling me that she's down...she's sad...I can't believe her anymore. I just couldn't stand it!! I can't deal with her!! I can't even get myself to confront her and talk to her on the phone when she called me!! I thought she grew up too like me and she would be different!! She never did!!
So when she smsed me again...just like every night now...I replied her sms telling her not to call me anymore that I'm uncomfortable talking to her and even requested for my number to be deleted.
I know that she's in need of a person to give her the attention she never had and all but she scares me a lot...I feel so bad right now....feel so guilty...I'm feeling guilty of having a sense of relief from having to deal with her everyday. I can't help but feel relieved. Am I a cruel person? Am I a bad person and friend? Coz I really don't want to be that kind of person...I really didn't want to hurt her!!
FaMiLY
I can't believe it!! It just suddenly hit me...although I was reminded a week ago.
Today...well, technically its yesterday since I'm posting my blog at 2am...
Its been exactly 7 years since my grandma passed away...
I could recall almost everything that happened on that day...and I'm quite surprised actually that I miss her sooo much...
In remembrance of her, I had dinner at my uncle's house together with my grandaunt (my grandma's sister) and of course with the rest of my family.
All I could think of when it hit me was...look at my life throughout that 7 years and what God has brought me through...I really so wished that my grandma was with me and looking at what I've accomplished so far...how far I've grown...I even wonder if she misses me too....
Its always touchy moments like this...I always feel like the luckiest person in the world...
I mean...I have such a great family...although I admit that relationship with family members are never always sweet and nice. But whenever I reflect on the core part of my relationship with my family members, it always give me that warmth and tingly feeling inside. It somehow never fails to make me feel contented with my life.
And I always would be reminded then not to take any of them for granted especially when things get hard...or disagreements may come up.
I really thank God for blessing me with a great family who have showered all the love and support and encouragement on me for the past 20 years of my life and I know they will continue to do so...I am the luckiest person in the world!!No doubt about it!!
Today...well, technically its yesterday since I'm posting my blog at 2am...
Its been exactly 7 years since my grandma passed away...
I could recall almost everything that happened on that day...and I'm quite surprised actually that I miss her sooo much...
In remembrance of her, I had dinner at my uncle's house together with my grandaunt (my grandma's sister) and of course with the rest of my family.
All I could think of when it hit me was...look at my life throughout that 7 years and what God has brought me through...I really so wished that my grandma was with me and looking at what I've accomplished so far...how far I've grown...I even wonder if she misses me too....
Its always touchy moments like this...I always feel like the luckiest person in the world...
I mean...I have such a great family...although I admit that relationship with family members are never always sweet and nice. But whenever I reflect on the core part of my relationship with my family members, it always give me that warmth and tingly feeling inside. It somehow never fails to make me feel contented with my life.
And I always would be reminded then not to take any of them for granted especially when things get hard...or disagreements may come up.
I really thank God for blessing me with a great family who have showered all the love and support and encouragement on me for the past 20 years of my life and I know they will continue to do so...I am the luckiest person in the world!!No doubt about it!!
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
My CNY 2006!!
This is my 50th Post...Yay!!
I'm sitting at home right now...hiding away from having to entertain guests...my relatives from Klang...like every Chinese New Year they would do their normal visit to my house coz my grandpa lives with us.
This year's CNY I think was the most boring of all... I still remember when I was little... CNY would be something I really get excited about...shopping for new clothes, getting ang pows... meeting relatives whom I only see once a year...and of course, friends....
But now... it has somehow become a routine. Although yea...it was good to meet with my relatives at least once a year....and omigosh!! I was called Aunty already!!NO!!
Despite the feeling of "boringness"....I still like CNY coz families actually would go the extra mile during this period to meet with relatives and friends whom they have not met for a while like mine.
So wish everyone a great CNY and a great holiday too!! May 2006 be a prosperous and joyfull year ahead!!
I'm sitting at home right now...hiding away from having to entertain guests...my relatives from Klang...like every Chinese New Year they would do their normal visit to my house coz my grandpa lives with us.
This year's CNY I think was the most boring of all... I still remember when I was little... CNY would be something I really get excited about...shopping for new clothes, getting ang pows... meeting relatives whom I only see once a year...and of course, friends....
But now... it has somehow become a routine. Although yea...it was good to meet with my relatives at least once a year....and omigosh!! I was called Aunty already!!NO!!
Despite the feeling of "boringness"....I still like CNY coz families actually would go the extra mile during this period to meet with relatives and friends whom they have not met for a while like mine.
So wish everyone a great CNY and a great holiday too!! May 2006 be a prosperous and joyfull year ahead!!
Saturday, January 21, 2006
"OASiS"
"Oasis" is a place where people living in the desert desperately draw every single drop of water they could get to quench their thirst. And God is like the water and we are the desert people desperately insearch of something that would quench the desires of our lives. Thats why MYF's youth celebration's called OASIS.
The turn out of the 1st Oasis was really good...and what the speaker, Annette talked about how we tend to think about our lives are so true. And one of the examples she gave just nailed how I felt lately.
I felt like serving in church was too much and I was fearful that church would become a distraction for me from my studies. I felt that week after week, serving in church, being active like I always am made me feel even more empty inside.
I thought it was because my heart wasnt in tune with God and I was probably distracted by other stuff... I really dont know what was going on inside me. So, I pushed myself. Like Anette said...I pushed and squeeze everything in me to worship and serve Him in everyway I could, trying to put my heart and soul into it too...but still...I felt empty
I really dont know what to do...I still am feeling it...Maybe I didnt worship God hard enough? Maybe I didnt surrender myself totally? I really dont know.
But now as I'm sitting in my room thinking about it all...I feel that assurance that God does know how I trully feel deep inside and to just hang on to him. I did feel refreshed after the worship and all but I think I'm still trying to work these things out.
I'm a person who's more of do-er (action) and most of the time try not to feel bcoz I always fear of getting hurt, which so far this statement does work for me. But when I got into MYF and became closer with everyone there, I learnt that God put emotions or feelings for a reason which is definitely not to make us get hurt. He placed it in us so that He can connect with us is such a deep manner that words can't even describe it. Its that tingly feeling, the warmth and the inner joy when the Holy Spirit fills my heart. I always believed that putting things into action is more worthwhile and how I feel in not necessary. But I'm wrong! Now...day by day, I'm learning to open myself up both to God and the people around me. Not to open up just by surface but my whole self. To share my very true self with everyone and maybe someday God would use me to touch someone's life.
I know its long and all but..I'm learning about my deeper feelings each day...and hopefully these feelings of emptiness will be filled someday. I definitely would continue praying coz I know that God never fails me or anyone..
The turn out of the 1st Oasis was really good...and what the speaker, Annette talked about how we tend to think about our lives are so true. And one of the examples she gave just nailed how I felt lately.
I felt like serving in church was too much and I was fearful that church would become a distraction for me from my studies. I felt that week after week, serving in church, being active like I always am made me feel even more empty inside.
I thought it was because my heart wasnt in tune with God and I was probably distracted by other stuff... I really dont know what was going on inside me. So, I pushed myself. Like Anette said...I pushed and squeeze everything in me to worship and serve Him in everyway I could, trying to put my heart and soul into it too...but still...I felt empty
I really dont know what to do...I still am feeling it...Maybe I didnt worship God hard enough? Maybe I didnt surrender myself totally? I really dont know.
But now as I'm sitting in my room thinking about it all...I feel that assurance that God does know how I trully feel deep inside and to just hang on to him. I did feel refreshed after the worship and all but I think I'm still trying to work these things out.
I'm a person who's more of do-er (action) and most of the time try not to feel bcoz I always fear of getting hurt, which so far this statement does work for me. But when I got into MYF and became closer with everyone there, I learnt that God put emotions or feelings for a reason which is definitely not to make us get hurt. He placed it in us so that He can connect with us is such a deep manner that words can't even describe it. Its that tingly feeling, the warmth and the inner joy when the Holy Spirit fills my heart. I always believed that putting things into action is more worthwhile and how I feel in not necessary. But I'm wrong! Now...day by day, I'm learning to open myself up both to God and the people around me. Not to open up just by surface but my whole self. To share my very true self with everyone and maybe someday God would use me to touch someone's life.
I know its long and all but..I'm learning about my deeper feelings each day...and hopefully these feelings of emptiness will be filled someday. I definitely would continue praying coz I know that God never fails me or anyone..
Friday, January 13, 2006
I HaTe ReNaL SyStEm!!
Just after a nice week's break...and now Woosh!! Its end of renal system which is scheduled to last for only 3 weeks and exams like next friday!!
*SOBS* So not prepared yet...struggling to finish studying...everythings in such a rush... plus being one of the tougher systems doesn't help either
Got sick last week and hoping to fully recover soon...Hopefully I'll be able to get through this... and the rest of the semester....Back to my books again....Haih.....
*SOBS* So not prepared yet...struggling to finish studying...everythings in such a rush... plus being one of the tougher systems doesn't help either
Got sick last week and hoping to fully recover soon...Hopefully I'll be able to get through this... and the rest of the semester....Back to my books again....Haih.....
Friday, January 06, 2006
My MiSeRaBLe DaY...
Yesterday I got an sms from my friend...her mum whom I mentioned before finally passed away as her liver failed from breast cancer that spread to the liver and pelvic bone...Its kinda cruel to look at it this way...but finally my friend would have a closure from hanging on to her mum whom we all know has been terminally ill for the past few months. She can now close this part of her life and begin a new journey but of course with the memory of her parents in her.
Out of everything that has happened...I trully admire my friend's strength and determination to pick herself up and carry the responsibilities of her parents to take care of her younger sister and also continue to complete her studies...
Today...I was miserable...couldn't sleep properly the previous night and my flu reached it peak making me feel unwell and miserable...
I saw the doctor in the morning...but I knew I have a bacterial flu coz I was trying to check my own sore throat the previous night...He said I had all the signs of influenza..so antibiotics...
Later, when I reached uni for lessons...omigosh!! The skin beneath my left eye swell up..it looked hideous!! Didn't know wat to do...but got no choice...so I tried avoiding talking to anyone and went straight for PBL...After PBL I called my mum and went home so that she could drive me back to see the doctor again.
Omigosh...it was a different doctor at the clinic and this old man...has no bedside manners at all!! Talk about learning behavioural science and learning to put patients interest first...any student in IMU would be better than him anyday..plus, he supposed to be a lecturing doctor in a public medical uni...
He even criticised me for being concerned bout the swelling on my eye...and all IMU FEMALE students are pampered!! I was like...wats ur problem? And before I left his "advice" to me was..."Behave Yourself!!"...???Wat does that mean??I dunno??He's such a weirdo and never in my life I'm gonna see him again neither would I want to be in the same uni he's lecturing in...
Intimidated by an old man...so called lecturing and experienced doctor...he's worse than HOUSE M.D. He couldn't even tell me whats the cause of my swelling...and I myself could come up with one...Its just my unlucky day to meet a doctor like him!!
Out of everything that has happened...I trully admire my friend's strength and determination to pick herself up and carry the responsibilities of her parents to take care of her younger sister and also continue to complete her studies...
Today...I was miserable...couldn't sleep properly the previous night and my flu reached it peak making me feel unwell and miserable...
I saw the doctor in the morning...but I knew I have a bacterial flu coz I was trying to check my own sore throat the previous night...He said I had all the signs of influenza..so antibiotics...
Later, when I reached uni for lessons...omigosh!! The skin beneath my left eye swell up..it looked hideous!! Didn't know wat to do...but got no choice...so I tried avoiding talking to anyone and went straight for PBL...After PBL I called my mum and went home so that she could drive me back to see the doctor again.
Omigosh...it was a different doctor at the clinic and this old man...has no bedside manners at all!! Talk about learning behavioural science and learning to put patients interest first...any student in IMU would be better than him anyday..plus, he supposed to be a lecturing doctor in a public medical uni...
He even criticised me for being concerned bout the swelling on my eye...and all IMU FEMALE students are pampered!! I was like...wats ur problem? And before I left his "advice" to me was..."Behave Yourself!!"...???Wat does that mean??I dunno??He's such a weirdo and never in my life I'm gonna see him again neither would I want to be in the same uni he's lecturing in...
Intimidated by an old man...so called lecturing and experienced doctor...he's worse than HOUSE M.D. He couldn't even tell me whats the cause of my swelling...and I myself could come up with one...Its just my unlucky day to meet a doctor like him!!
Friday, December 30, 2005
MaLaCCa TRiP... AwEsOmE!!
This one week break before the new year begins and a year full of new plus bigger challenges ahead I'm so happy to be able to use it to the fullest.
After a super stressful Reproductive System Assesment...Finally got holiday!! Woohoo!! =P
I went Malacca with the invitation to stay at A-Sister's place (Nisha's house) together with my 2 other uni mates...Christabel and Man Keat..Waking up early to catch the bus was worth it coz the trip was tons of fun!!
We shopped at Jonker's street and sight see the various historical spots...recalling my childhood days where I was so amazed by the buildings..plus I had a tasty bowl of ice kacang...yumm!!
Next best thing was the A Famosa Waterpark...where we went together with Nisha's family..And I went on the craziest slide ever...but didnt have the guts to take the even steeper slide at the last minute but tricked Man Keat into doing it instead haha!! We sat on the tube together with Christabel which slides up so high on the side that you are actually facing vertically downwards...Wacky!!
Tomorrow's another long day...MYF will be singing for church's new year eve service...and I need to be there early...but it'll be fun too!!
I just feel that I'm the luckiest person to be able to have such great friends and blessed with so many good and fun times...
Well...HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!! MAY ALL THE DREAMS AND WISHES YOU HAVE FOR 2006 COME TRUE...HAVE A BLAST WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY!! GOD BLESS!!
After a super stressful Reproductive System Assesment...Finally got holiday!! Woohoo!! =P
I went Malacca with the invitation to stay at A-Sister's place (Nisha's house) together with my 2 other uni mates...Christabel and Man Keat..Waking up early to catch the bus was worth it coz the trip was tons of fun!!
We shopped at Jonker's street and sight see the various historical spots...recalling my childhood days where I was so amazed by the buildings..plus I had a tasty bowl of ice kacang...yumm!!
Next best thing was the A Famosa Waterpark...where we went together with Nisha's family..And I went on the craziest slide ever...but didnt have the guts to take the even steeper slide at the last minute but tricked Man Keat into doing it instead haha!! We sat on the tube together with Christabel which slides up so high on the side that you are actually facing vertically downwards...Wacky!!
Tomorrow's another long day...MYF will be singing for church's new year eve service...and I need to be there early...but it'll be fun too!!
I just feel that I'm the luckiest person to be able to have such great friends and blessed with so many good and fun times...
Well...HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!! MAY ALL THE DREAMS AND WISHES YOU HAVE FOR 2006 COME TRUE...HAVE A BLAST WITH YOUR FRIENDS AND FAMILY!! GOD BLESS!!
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
God's Grace & Love..
Today I felt something I haven't felt for sometime....
As I was pouring out my feelings of sadness for my friend...I felt that I wasn't doing anything to help her...and it made me feel bad
I went to her house today together with my mum and 2 other aunties whom we know in church..none of us knew what to expect or do coz we don't know her actual needs or situation.
I really do admire my friend. She didn't give up on things but instead tried to take up the responsibility to take care of her family as she's the eldest daughter. Although she was emotionally discouraged at times, she took things in such a positive manner and remain strong. Something I dont know if I could carry if I was in her shoes.
I believe that God made it happen in a such a way that my mum's close friend, shared with the rest of the church members in one of their meetings about my friend the previous night. People were touched and started to donate some money to help my friend and one aunty even volunteered to come with us to visit her although she doesn't know her at all.
Now, my mum and the other 2 aunties are trying their best to get help from every source they could think of to help lift the few burdens off my friend's shoulders especially helping her with finances to complete her studies and I believe somehow its part of God's work in my friend's life.
The only thing all of us can do is to pray for her and her family that their burdens would be lifted by God and He will fill them with the strength that day need to get through each day. I pray that God will grant my friend the assurance that everything will turn out right with God by her side and she'll find peace in Him. And of course, God would ease her mum's pain and suffering as much as possible and come to know Christ as well...
Despite all that has happened, somehow God showed the 4 of us and my friend and her family hope...like something that caught my attention today.
The dark skies and heavy downpour with thunder and lightning are only for a short period and God can just clear them away and bring back the clear blue sky plus a beautiful rainbow. And that's my wish for my dear friend this coming new year.
As I was pouring out my feelings of sadness for my friend...I felt that I wasn't doing anything to help her...and it made me feel bad
I went to her house today together with my mum and 2 other aunties whom we know in church..none of us knew what to expect or do coz we don't know her actual needs or situation.
I really do admire my friend. She didn't give up on things but instead tried to take up the responsibility to take care of her family as she's the eldest daughter. Although she was emotionally discouraged at times, she took things in such a positive manner and remain strong. Something I dont know if I could carry if I was in her shoes.
I believe that God made it happen in a such a way that my mum's close friend, shared with the rest of the church members in one of their meetings about my friend the previous night. People were touched and started to donate some money to help my friend and one aunty even volunteered to come with us to visit her although she doesn't know her at all.
Now, my mum and the other 2 aunties are trying their best to get help from every source they could think of to help lift the few burdens off my friend's shoulders especially helping her with finances to complete her studies and I believe somehow its part of God's work in my friend's life.
The only thing all of us can do is to pray for her and her family that their burdens would be lifted by God and He will fill them with the strength that day need to get through each day. I pray that God will grant my friend the assurance that everything will turn out right with God by her side and she'll find peace in Him. And of course, God would ease her mum's pain and suffering as much as possible and come to know Christ as well...
Despite all that has happened, somehow God showed the 4 of us and my friend and her family hope...like something that caught my attention today.
The dark skies and heavy downpour with thunder and lightning are only for a short period and God can just clear them away and bring back the clear blue sky plus a beautiful rainbow. And that's my wish for my dear friend this coming new year.
My HoPe FoR ThE CoMiNg DaY...
I'm finally keeping up to my promise to go visit my dear friend...
I know she's currently going through a lot of stuff...things I could never imagine myself facing...
Its the same friend I described previously...
I just really wanna pray that God would give me and the rest of us going to visit her and her family the strength, wisdom and of course love that would touch their hearts and lives... Hopefully, we would be able to touch her mother's heart especially as she's terminally ill... of course my friend and her sis too...
We're all going to visit her and see what we can do for her mum as well as for my friend and her sister.
I really don't know what to expect or do yet...but I know that I wont need to rely on my own strength or worry about anything...coz God would be with me...
All I really wanna do is to be with her..and to let her know that I'm always there for her...and to share with her the God whom I love and has filled my life.
I pray that she would know Him too...so that her seemingly empty life would soon be filled with everlasting joy, love, peace and hope.
I know she's currently going through a lot of stuff...things I could never imagine myself facing...
Its the same friend I described previously...
I just really wanna pray that God would give me and the rest of us going to visit her and her family the strength, wisdom and of course love that would touch their hearts and lives... Hopefully, we would be able to touch her mother's heart especially as she's terminally ill... of course my friend and her sis too...
We're all going to visit her and see what we can do for her mum as well as for my friend and her sister.
I really don't know what to expect or do yet...but I know that I wont need to rely on my own strength or worry about anything...coz God would be with me...
All I really wanna do is to be with her..and to let her know that I'm always there for her...and to share with her the God whom I love and has filled my life.
I pray that she would know Him too...so that her seemingly empty life would soon be filled with everlasting joy, love, peace and hope.
Monday, December 26, 2005
Its ChRiStMaS DaY!!
Finally....the awaited day has come...Christmas!! A time of joy...love...friendship...family...
I am so blessed with great family and friends...and of course to have God in my life...
Christmas always speaks of God who loved us so much that despite our sinful nature He sent His Son to earth as a man to die on the cross on behalf of all of us... He is the One who still loves and cares for us the most despite all our imperfectness...
Just being able to celebrate Christmas and knowing the true meaning of Christmas all my life is already a gift...coz I have received the gift of salvation just by believing in Jesus!!
However at the same time...my heart is saddened...
I got to know about a dear friend of mine whom I have known since primary school...she was my classmate most of the years we were in school...
She's a very bright and smart student...ever hardworking...always the top student..and yet she would still help me with the difficult subjects like math...
We used to chat a lot on the bus together...and she's a great listener...
Recently, her dad passed away suddenly...but I heard it was due to lung infection...and even before that...I was told her mum is terminally ill...
I remember her telling me that her plans were to quickly finish her course and get her degree so that she could start working and support her family...she does her best to complete her course in the shortest time possible...and I really admire her for that.
After hearing about her family...my heart just melted...I can only imagine how she's feeling... I do really want to be there for her...and let her know that she still has support and someone who loves her...
I do pray that God will give her the strength and fill her heart with love and take away the feeling of loss from her...for I know the feeling of loosing someone I love a lot...
I am so blessed with great family and friends...and of course to have God in my life...
Christmas always speaks of God who loved us so much that despite our sinful nature He sent His Son to earth as a man to die on the cross on behalf of all of us... He is the One who still loves and cares for us the most despite all our imperfectness...
Just being able to celebrate Christmas and knowing the true meaning of Christmas all my life is already a gift...coz I have received the gift of salvation just by believing in Jesus!!
However at the same time...my heart is saddened...
I got to know about a dear friend of mine whom I have known since primary school...she was my classmate most of the years we were in school...
She's a very bright and smart student...ever hardworking...always the top student..and yet she would still help me with the difficult subjects like math...
We used to chat a lot on the bus together...and she's a great listener...
Recently, her dad passed away suddenly...but I heard it was due to lung infection...and even before that...I was told her mum is terminally ill...
I remember her telling me that her plans were to quickly finish her course and get her degree so that she could start working and support her family...she does her best to complete her course in the shortest time possible...and I really admire her for that.
After hearing about her family...my heart just melted...I can only imagine how she's feeling... I do really want to be there for her...and let her know that she still has support and someone who loves her...
I do pray that God will give her the strength and fill her heart with love and take away the feeling of loss from her...for I know the feeling of loosing someone I love a lot...
Saturday, December 24, 2005
CaNt BeLieVe IT!! Its Christmas!! Its the end of 2005!!
Hooray!! Exams are done!! Its time to celebrate Christmas!! Plus I have a week break and *poof*It'll be 2006 in a weeks time too!!
I had such a great time this month although I was dreading the anticipation of facing my reproductice system test. But the rest was worth it. Going to FRIM, Christmas party, hanging out with my friends & family, family trip to Cameron's....Its was all so fun!!
This is kinda like my 20th Christmas I guess...and each year God blesses me with surprises!! We would tend to think that celebrating Christmas every year would soon become some sort of a routine but as for me, God always seem to amaze me with His surprises...making each Christmas unique...
Each year I always felt the warmth, the joy in celebrating Christmas...although its sad to see others not knowing the true Christmas story...and treating it as just another holiday...
I believe I can say proudly today the I'm one of the most blessed person on earth to have received so much of blessings both from God and the people I love...
So....those of you feeling down...during this Christmas...pick yourself up....believe in the true meaning of Christmas...and trust me...God will do wonders for you...!!
Have a blessed Christmas everyone!! And A superb New Year 2006 too!!
I had such a great time this month although I was dreading the anticipation of facing my reproductice system test. But the rest was worth it. Going to FRIM, Christmas party, hanging out with my friends & family, family trip to Cameron's....Its was all so fun!!
This is kinda like my 20th Christmas I guess...and each year God blesses me with surprises!! We would tend to think that celebrating Christmas every year would soon become some sort of a routine but as for me, God always seem to amaze me with His surprises...making each Christmas unique...
Each year I always felt the warmth, the joy in celebrating Christmas...although its sad to see others not knowing the true Christmas story...and treating it as just another holiday...
I believe I can say proudly today the I'm one of the most blessed person on earth to have received so much of blessings both from God and the people I love...
So....those of you feeling down...during this Christmas...pick yourself up....believe in the true meaning of Christmas...and trust me...God will do wonders for you...!!
Have a blessed Christmas everyone!! And A superb New Year 2006 too!!
Monday, December 05, 2005
Boring...Boring...Boring...
Life ever since returning back to uni has been pretty boring...
Of course...I'm glad to meet my friends again...
It's just that normally its holiday at this time of the year...but...this year's different...
I'm finding it hard to concentrate and study with so many other exciting stuff happening around me...and my test is coming up on December 23...
So...when I'm looking forward to Christmas it also means that I am looking forward to the test.. which is not something I would want to think about right now looking at the pile of notes growing day by day...
Well..we'll see how things would go as time passes on....
Hopefully I can cover everything before the test....
Gotta return back to my books...*Sigh*
Of course...I'm glad to meet my friends again...
It's just that normally its holiday at this time of the year...but...this year's different...
I'm finding it hard to concentrate and study with so many other exciting stuff happening around me...and my test is coming up on December 23...
So...when I'm looking forward to Christmas it also means that I am looking forward to the test.. which is not something I would want to think about right now looking at the pile of notes growing day by day...
Well..we'll see how things would go as time passes on....
Hopefully I can cover everything before the test....
Gotta return back to my books...*Sigh*
Saturday, November 12, 2005
GP PoSTiNG + PLANET SHAKERS!!
Well...I've reached the 4th week of a 5 week rotation which u can say is kind of a holiday except when you have some practicals scheduled and this week was GP Posting Week!! Basically I have to be at the clinic for 5 days observing the general practitioner do his job...and the clinic I chose was in Ampang.. I didnt know what to expect at the beggining and so I was nervous..but it turned out pretty well...
The doctor was really eager to teach me everything he possibly could...So here are some of the things I saw..
The doctor was really eager to teach me everything he possibly could...So here are some of the things I saw..
- Normal cases of flu and diarrhea
- Dengue cases
- Ultrasound of a fetus
- Examine some patients, take BP, watch taking of blood and blood glucose test
- Ultrasound of abdomen (saw gallbladder stones)
- ECG
- Learn how to do a spot diagnosis based on patient's symptoms
- Saw an actual patient with Parkinson's
- Saw another patient with "trigger finger"
- Saw x-ray of a fractured scapula, glenoid process and 6th, 7th and 8th rib
- Auscultate for "ronchi" (wheezing)
- Saw a patient with a full blown cataract
But the highlight of my week was attending Planet Shakers concert...it was amazing just to be there, among thousands of youths filling up Sunway Convention Centre...Feeling God's presence and getting excited to praise God with music....Unspeakable joy just fills my heart....Watching youths from all over the country and even from the South East Asian Region gather together, getting excited to praise and worship God...Wow!! On the last night the hall was so full...there wasn't enough seats eventhough they had already extended the hall further...
I think the best part of all was being there together with all the MYFers...getting excited and enjoying ourselves praising God together...Just hope that this excitement for God will grow even more and more in each and everyone of us...so much that it'll touch others' lives....
Friday, November 04, 2005
IRONiNG 101
It's Deeparaya break!! Cool rite? Well...I am enjoying the week off...but somehow I couldn't stand it anymore...not doing anything at all...
I did visit the dentist finally after so long....and well...I had my routine scaling...but then, the dentist told me something I really didn't expect or want to hear...
According to her the reason my front teeth is starting to get crooked although I already did my braces...was bcoz my wisdom teeth were sleeping towards the molars...compressing them...so, she encouraged me to think about removing the 2 wisdom tooth...Gosh!! Already I'm ever so afraid of dentists...and to think that I will never have to remove anymore teeth in my entire life after having to pull 4 teeth out to do my braces...BoY!! Was I wrong...and this one's no joke...it will be painful and there'll be swelling...It's gonna be a small surgery !! But I figure I shall delay it as long as possible...Since it's not an emergency kinda thing...
Later we shopped and had lunch at Midvalley (my 2nd home)...nothing special really...bought some clothes...
When we returned home..I just couldn't stand sleeping although I was tired coz I slept late the last night..So somehow I just had the mood for ironing....
Its a good thing coz there were lots of clothes that were hanging on the rack...and my mum was already getting sick of having to iron so many clothes...
Finally I guess...I did make an effort to help with housework...and I just dont know why..but I was enjoying it...listening to the radio..and fumbling with the iron at 1st...
I was really happy when for once I did finish ironing all the clothes..so was my mum...haha!!
This was the one house chore I didnt feel sick of doing...Surprising!!=p
I did visit the dentist finally after so long....and well...I had my routine scaling...but then, the dentist told me something I really didn't expect or want to hear...
According to her the reason my front teeth is starting to get crooked although I already did my braces...was bcoz my wisdom teeth were sleeping towards the molars...compressing them...so, she encouraged me to think about removing the 2 wisdom tooth...Gosh!! Already I'm ever so afraid of dentists...and to think that I will never have to remove anymore teeth in my entire life after having to pull 4 teeth out to do my braces...BoY!! Was I wrong...and this one's no joke...it will be painful and there'll be swelling...It's gonna be a small surgery !! But I figure I shall delay it as long as possible...Since it's not an emergency kinda thing...
Later we shopped and had lunch at Midvalley (my 2nd home)...nothing special really...bought some clothes...
When we returned home..I just couldn't stand sleeping although I was tired coz I slept late the last night..So somehow I just had the mood for ironing....
Its a good thing coz there were lots of clothes that were hanging on the rack...and my mum was already getting sick of having to iron so many clothes...
Finally I guess...I did make an effort to help with housework...and I just dont know why..but I was enjoying it...listening to the radio..and fumbling with the iron at 1st...
I was really happy when for once I did finish ironing all the clothes..so was my mum...haha!!
This was the one house chore I didnt feel sick of doing...Surprising!!=p
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
A MeMoRaBLe DeePaVaLi LuNcH..
Its was an unsually sunny day coz it had been raining throughout Monday...for once the sky was clear and bright...unlike the gloomy days we've been having...
Finally have the opportunity to meet up with my secondary school best friends..Pui Yong, Jasmine and Karmini...after a long time...we used to go to Karmini's house during Deepavali when we were all still in school...
Hah...it was so fun to chat with them again...although it felt pretty awkward at first..guess bcoz Karmini's college friends whom we met for the 1st time were also there...But later...once we got warmed up with each other...we chatted so long that I didnt realise it was already nearing 5pm
I had a great Deepavali lunch thanks to Karmini's mum who cooked really good food..Yummy!!
Couldn't stop muching the snacks laid on the table also..haha...
Really do miss those times we used to spend together...we can chat for hours and hours....
Well..I'm thankful that we do still keep in touch with each other...that's a good thing!!
Finally have the opportunity to meet up with my secondary school best friends..Pui Yong, Jasmine and Karmini...after a long time...we used to go to Karmini's house during Deepavali when we were all still in school...
Hah...it was so fun to chat with them again...although it felt pretty awkward at first..guess bcoz Karmini's college friends whom we met for the 1st time were also there...But later...once we got warmed up with each other...we chatted so long that I didnt realise it was already nearing 5pm
I had a great Deepavali lunch thanks to Karmini's mum who cooked really good food..Yummy!!
Couldn't stop muching the snacks laid on the table also..haha...
Really do miss those times we used to spend together...we can chat for hours and hours....
Well..I'm thankful that we do still keep in touch with each other...that's a good thing!!
Saturday, October 29, 2005
Post KKB Syndrome
Wow!! After all the excitement and fun of this week....I'm already starting to miss it all!!
Things I missed about KKB posting:
Things I missed about KKB posting:
- cool and fresh air, quiet and peaceful unlike the busy town of KL
- learning how to play "Settlers" from Man Keat...later Christabel and I got addicted to the game
- ganging up against Kang Meng at Settlers with Man Keat and Nisha...bcoz of that I won!!Haha...Poor guy....
- sharing the same house with Christabel and Nisha (chatting till 3am)
- BBQ night: keeping the fire alive, trying to defrost the frozen chicken, eating marshmallows coated with marjerin (really tasty!!), getting high for no reason..
- playing speed and lossing to Man Keat and Bryan...played "Big 2 " too...
- playing mafia in the dark and watching movies (although I slept halfway)
- walking to KKB town...eating ice cream....running away from Ben's singing
- the cute and fat rabbit hopping all around which everyone seemed to want to cook it during BBQ
- watching all the food disappear into our hungry tummies during our dinner on the last night at 98 restaurant
- every effort we put to entertain ourselves in the quiet town
- Thomas looking for his "sotong balls" (mistery still not solved yet)
- Watching the others play "Bridge"..still unfamiliar with the game though but it was interesting to watch....
But then since we got back from KKB and also after hanging out together yesterday at MidValley and my bday dinner...I suddenly felt so tired...
I guess I didnt really rest properly after coming back from KKB and we went out again the next day...so my body didnt hav a chance to recover....
Anyways...post KKB I'm missing all the fun and laughs as well as the craziness we had at KKB...
Plus its our last posting to that quaint town....
Hmm....cant believe I'm gonna finish my phase 1 with just less than a year left.... Anyways..this is one of the best KKB postings I've had so far...and I'll never forget it!!
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