Friday, July 21, 2006

Do BaD THiNGs ReaLLY HaPPeN iN THReeS??

I think this month has been one of the toughest months I've had for quite some time...
I suppose it came unexpectedly coz I was caught off-guard having life laid out so easy for me all along..I'm not complaining about life being easy...in fact, I'm thankful to God for such blessings.

First my grandpa (my dad's father who lives with me) fell sick with pneumonia and he somehow got depressed. He didn't want to eat properly...all he ate was bread and porridge which worried my parents and I. He was tired a lot and didn't really want to move from his chair. He was very negative and trying to talk him out of depression and encourage him took a lot of effort for all of us at home. I was getting tired of it...but thank God, he soon recovered bit by bit and soon he was himself again. All of us were so thrilled.

Then came the definiting factor for my first phase in med school. Passing EOS 5. I was behind time and had to resort to burning midnight oil for the past 2-3 weeks. When the time came to sit for the exam, I lost my confidence. At least I thought I did. I think I did badly and all I can do now is pray and hope for a PASS!! Which I'm in soooo desperate need of....

Finally, just after exam...I heard a confirmation about my other grandpa's (my mum's father) conditon. He was at 1st diagnosed with peptic ulcer, but the biopsy results came out positive for infiltrative moderately differentiated adenocarcinoma of the stomach at a few areas. Why?? Why is it happening??Isnt it enough that he already gone through a previous history of oral cancer??
The worst thing is that the surgery would be a high risk one coz my grandpa's kidney is on the verge to renal failure. And so, my aunts and uncle decided to not opt for any surgery but allow my grandpa to live the rest of his days to the fullest. When the magnitude of what was happening hit me...I could feel my heart melt. I just can't imagine how things in the future be like.

This is the one time in my life I just wish the future wouldn't come...at the very least not so soon. Will things get better? I hope it does.

I know that all I can do is pray and trust that God will bring me and the rest my family through the saddest and most difficult period ahead...I know that God will help...and so I pray and hope that He will grant us all strength, wisdom and most of all love as we move onwards.