Wednesday, July 27, 2005

LiFe SoMeTiMeS LeT Me DoWn...

I've never felt this feeling for a while now...the feeling of being left out...of not belonging.... Walking alone watching everyone pass me by...trying to stay composed and preventing myself from breaking down overwhelmed by those mixed emotions.....
I felt myself trying sort the turmoil of emotions running through my mind..."was it my fault?"...
"why did i allow it to happen?"....."why was I so nice when i didnt hav to be?"..."why am i feeling this way?It's silly!!"..."why am i so silly to put myself in vulnerable positions?"..."I wished I had someone who would comfort me...be the one who would try to care for me....and not me always on the active side alone"

At times I would feel myself being so gullible and simple....and silly....
Always tend to be the active one in caring for someone....even when ppl around me probably would not want my help....or even get intimidated by my eagerness to help...and finally in the end feel like i wasn't appreciated...but either way its my fault...i put myself in this position...

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